Bottoming Basics

WellnessPelvic Floor
Written By Willy Quach

Gaynal Sex: Just the Tip(s)

Receptive anal intercourse, or bottoming, is a common sexual activity among gay men. It can be a fun activity and can lead to various types of orgasms. However, it is often perceived as painful or uncomfortable, which can lead to decreased sexual satisfaction, avoidance of anal intercourse, or injury. The good news is that pelvic floor physical therapy can help alleviate the discomfort and pain associated with bottoming, making it possible to enjoy this activity without pain or discomfort.

In the meantime, here are some quick tips on how to bottom:

Diet:

  • Eat plenty of fiber-rich foods to keep your digestive system healthy and regular

    • Psyllium husk is a bottom's best friend, but remember to take your medications at least 1 hour before or 2-4 hours after your psyllium supplement

    • You do not need to starve or have a water diet

  • Drink plenty of water to stay hydrated and help prevent constipation

  • Remember, a good bowel movement is regular, well-formed, and requires minimal wiping!

  • Do not strain with pooping! Get a squatty potty to help minimize difficulty with passing stools

Preparation:

  • Use plenty of lubricant to reduce friction and prevent injury. I recommend Slippery Stuff (water-based) or Uberlube (silicone)

  • Start with smaller toys (rectal dilators) or fingers and work your way up to larger ones to help your body adjust

  • Practice relaxation techniques like deep diaphragmatic (belly) breathing or meditation to help your body relax and make bottoming more comfortable

During:

  • Use plenty of lube (reapply often) and communicate with your partner to ensure you're both comfortable and enjoying the experience

  • Use condoms and PrEP to prevent sexually transmitted infections

  • Play with positioning! Usually, a deep squatting position is most comfortable at first

  • Listen to your body and take breaks if needed

Aftercare:

  • Check stool for any blood, pain, or discharge

  • Stay hydrated and get plenty of rest to help your body recover

  • Bidets are great to help clean without the friction of using toilet paper as much

  • Sitz baths (and Epsom salts) can be soothing before or after bottoming

I hope you find these tips helpful. Please see to a pelvic health specialist to see how to best optimize your sexual health.

Willy Quach
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